People always ask me – “Yergen, What is the story of SmashGiving?” Well grab a pillow, and settle in, because story time is about to begin.

Once upon a time, about – oohh – seventy-five years ago, there were early settlers in our great Super City. Of course back then it wasn’t known as Super City, it was called Ye Olde Tyme City. The people of Ye Olde Tyme City were a nice bunch of people. Yet one dark and stormy night a band of roving Yeti’s entered the town. They destroyed everything, and ate all the Ye Olde Tyme City’s food. The next few months were hard for the people. They did what they could to bring their town to the wonder and beauty that it was, but their hearts were broken, and they couldn’t bring themselves to finish. It was a sad sad time, and the people of Ye Olde Tyme City.

But when everything looked darkest, from out of the stars came a gleaming space ship. The space ship landed, and from out of it came my great great great grandfather, Flergen Von Shmergenbergen. He said he was from the distant land of Shmergonia. Well as you can image the people of Ye Olde Tyme City were flabbergasted. But a little child stepped up to Flergen, and asked if he needed anything. Well Flergen was so touched, by the selfless geasture that he called his alien friends, and they brought all kinds of things for the settlers of Ye Olde Tyme City.

When the setters were back on track they had a great feast to thank the aliens, and Flergen. The aliens brought all kinds of wild and exotic foods to the table. The gelatinous Sneezlefobs introduced, Turkey to the settlers, who decided to roast it with stuffing. The hairy BobBeasts from Pleasior 9 brought mashed potatoes to the feast, and Flergen added some gravy to it. The seductive Swizzillians introduced a pie to the feast. This pie was made from something they called a pumpkin. Lastly, the dreaded Funderhounds brought Flunder Pudding. It was so terrible, that no one touched it, and the Flunderhounds were asked to leave.

Suddenly in the middle of the feast the yetis came back, and this time they brought robotic dinosaurs, and werewolves with them. Without a step, Flergen jumped from the table, and single handedly knocked the teeth out of every werewolf. Then he turned his attention to the robotic dinosaurs. With his bare hands he ripped apart each metal casing of those robotic rebels. Lastly, were the yetis. Flergen lunged towards the fury force, and with his entire might defeated every last one. As the smoke cleared, the settlers of Ye Olde Tyme City saw Flergen Von Shmergenbergen emerge victorious. They ran, cheering towards him, and lifted them on their shoulders.

Since then we have been celebrating SmashGiving, to give thanks for all the good things we have, and for all that aliens from other worlds have brought us.

And that’s the true story of SmashGiving, or at least how my grandfather told it to me.

What’s going to happen next week?

Well well, my power people. A certain adorable yellow mayor’s birthday is next week, so expect something yellow next week. Oh yes, there will be yellow.